Love Follows Me

It has now been over a year since Gabby has left her journey on earth, to begin her new life in heaven. Although, a year has passed, my journey as a grieving mother still lives on. It is a journey that will follow me the remaining days of my life. I once believed that life without Gabby wouldn't go on, that her loss would only bring me heartache that would never heal, and I would have to continue to live my life in a world filled with sorrow and pain. I am glad to say, I no longer believe this.

The thoughts of Gabby have not lessend since losing her. I continue to think of Gabby every minute of everyday. She is the first person I think of when I wake up and the last person I think of before I fall asleep. In the beginning, these thoughts of her brought heartache and sorrow as it only reminded me of her loss and the empty feeling that remains within me. Today, these thoughts of her fill my heart with joy, and the emptiness I once felt is lessening.

Although, I had so much support from friends and family, one thing I could never escape was the feeling of lonliness. It followed me with every move I made. I was so angry at God and even more angry with Gabby for leaving me alone to deal with this pain. I am now realizing that God, nor Gabby have never left my side during this journey. I am beginning to feel Gabby's love in every move I make. I feel her love and presence in the warmth of the sun, I feel her touch as the wind brushes my cheek, I feel her tears as the rain falls on my skin, and I see her smile as she comes to me in my dreams.

I believe Gabby's presence has always been with me, Gabby has never left my side. I cannot see Gabby's presence, but I know it is there, I feel it everyday, and because of this...I know her love follows me.